Attention to Neglect
About the author, Jocelyn Gargus of Jackson Central-Merry High School is one of the first two Senior Fellows having completed two years of the Fellowship. She was thus awarded the title of Distinguished Senior Fellow. She is an inspiring, courageous young woman who represents the best of what the youth of Jackson can offer to the community. Together with the first cohort of Jackson Grown Fellows, she helped the Jackson Grown team launch the program in 2021. Jocelyn helped us imagine what the Jackson Grown Leader Fellowship could do and be. She also helped the team better understand what we could learn from the Fellows. Building on interests and talents for both art and performing arts as well as a deep commitment to serving the community, Jocelyn captured the attention of 50 leaders from across Jackson-Madison County in April 2022 at the 1st Annual Jackson Grown Challenge to the City. She spoke on the importance of improving the ways that we understand and communicate child abuse across the community. Jocelyn has been accepted to attend University of Memphis Lambuth to pursue nursing.
WARNING: This essay contains content which may be a trigger or distress some readers (abuse, neglect).
Together with Jackson Grown mentor and coach Lauren Pritchard (LOLO), Jocelyn Gargus practices public speaking and stage presence in front of other Fellows in February 2023 at the Public Speaking Skills Day. Photo Credit Hannah Gore
Where is my mom? When is my next meal going to be? Will I even get to eat at all? How can I make sure my brother has what he needs? No child should be concerned about things like this, but for me, this was normal because these were constant, legitimate concerns. Every day, I was forced to make decisions I was not prepared to make, but I had to adapt and provide for myself and my brother. Hearing that I was being abused was shocking because I had not known differently. My mind had grown accustomed to this treatment and I conceptualized abuse like most other people do, as only physical or sexual. I did not meet those standards, so I must not qualify as a child being abused, even if my life did not resemble that of a typical girl my age. Even as a victim of abuse, I was not informed of the full extent of child abuse, which meant I never knew how serious my problems were. Understanding the full scope of child abuse is essential so that other people do not live like I did for so long, unaware that there are formal ways to get help.
On stage at the 1st Annual Challenge to the City, Jocelyn Gargus delivers her first public speech in front of 50 community leaders at theCo in Jackson.
Jocelyn Gargus spoke on the importance of creating awareness of child abuse and helping communicating to children and youth how to recognize instances of abuse.
Child abuse is any form of maltreatment by an adult, which is violent or threatening for the child. The Federal Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act (CAPTA) defines child abuse and neglect as “any recent act or failure to act on the part of a parent or caretaker that results in emotional harm, sexual abuse or exploitation” or “any act or failure to act which presents an imminent risk of serious harm.” Both of these definitions encompass the commonly held beliefs about the dangers of violence or exploitation for children and they are certainly serious problems. Aspects of the definition that often go unnoticed are just as important. A caregiver's failure to act can be just as detrimental as their intentionally harmful actions. While this may not leave bodily evidence of abuse, the mental toll it takes can be deeply damaging. Whether it takes the form of physical harm, prolonged absences with no provisions, or verbal onslaughts, abuse is staggeringly prevalent.
At the 2022-2023 Jackson Grown Expert Leader Day, Jocelyn Gargus meets with T..J. King the Director of the Madison County Juvenile Court Services. They discuss challenges and needs related to addressing child abuse. Photo Credit Hannah Gore
As many as 1 in 7 children experienced child abuse or neglect in 2021 with a report of abuse happening around every 10 seconds (CDC 2022 & ChildHelp 2019). The commonality of abuse is shocking based on numerical data alone, but the detrimental impacts of abuse on development and later life experiences further intensify the problem. According to various research, children who have been abused are at higher risks for depression, suicide, drug and alcohol abuse, intimate partner violence, or sexual and reproductive health issues. Thinking about this at a macro level may show the scope of the problem, but considering it by individual case emphasizes its severity. Victims of abuse endure intense difficulty and are left to live with its considerable consequences. Life becomes a journey of overcoming your past and healing from something unjustly received, constantly aware of the odds stacked against you to thrive.
“Thinking about this at a macro level may show the scope of the problem, but considering it by individual cases emphasizes its severity.”
For me, every time my mom was gone for weeks at a time, yelled at me or insulted me, I felt these emotional and physical impacts. I would do anything and everything to get my mom’s validation. I experienced intense anxiety surrounding my performance on tests because my mom’s voice echoed in my head, reminding me I was not good enough. Her disparaging comments continued, building in severity until, at the mere age of 12, she told me I should kill myself. My mental health was shattered. My feelings of worthlessness consumed me and impacted not only my personal life, but my school performance as well. I hated who I was, and this took a toll on me. I stopped eating. I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror because I hated what I saw. I was plagued by depressive thoughts. I was only a child.
Together with singer and songwriter Tosh Neuman, Jocelyn Gargus, Kalin Earnest, Junior Fellow from South Side High School and Summer Nichols, Jackson Grown Mentor discuss ways of “singing a speech”. They reflect on ways of drawing an audience into a message. Tosh recently recorded and published the song “Heaven don’t need you now” which focuses on the issue of suicide prevention. Photo credit Hannah Gore
Nobody, especially not a child, should be subject to these experiences. While I was not left with physical marks on my body, suffering at the hands of my mom did deep damage. Understanding the variety of experiences with abuse is vital because the harm it does goes far beyond the moment it happens. Please call 877-237-0004 to report suspected child abuse or neglect. This anonymous, 24-hour hotline is available 365 days a year and is a vital source of aid for abuse victims. Inaction from unawareness is no longer an excuse; the time is now to act.
Jocelyn Gargus, Distinguised Senior Fellow from Jackson Central-Merry High School graduates high school in May 2023. Photo credit Hannnah Gore
The Leadership Essay Series is a collection of essays by Senior Fellows of the Jackson Grown Leader Fellowship. It is developed over the course of the second and final year of a student’s Fellowship. It is based on a topic which the Fellow has independently chosen to study, pursue and addresss during their time with Jackson Grown. In coordination with a team of experts, coaches and mentors the Fellows explore issues which they would like to address both now and in the future. The Leadership Essay is a significant achievement. Combined with speeches to a large group of commuunity leaders at the Annual Challenge to the City, the Leadership Essay is an important channel for students to communicate with audiences on issues that matter to them. Each Fellow works with a writing skills coach to develop and refine the essay. Mary Beth Propes, a rising Senior at Union University served as the Skills Coach for this essay.